Focus on where you want to be

We had stake conference today and one talk by Cheryl Moore, wife of the 1st counselor in the Albuquerque Temple Presidency, really resonated with me, that I thought I'd share it with you.  It probably had something to do with the farm story she told.
Cheryl grew up on a farm in Idaho diving tractors and all sorts of equipment to help out on the farm.  When she was twelve or thirteen, her dad need her help to drive the caterpillar combine to cut the wheat.  The caterpillar was different then the equipment she operated in the past.  It had tracts instead of just tires and it was operated by levers instead of a steering wheel.  Her dad gave her a lesson of how everything worked on the way to the field.  When you push on the left brake and move the right lever, it will turn right and when you push on the right brake and move the left lever, it will go left.




I understood a little what Cheryl was saying her because I've had similar crash course lessons and because I've operated a swather similar to the one pictured above with levers as well instead of a steering wheel that was owned by our neighbor, Kevin, in Canon.  Sometimes I felt like I was flying a plane.  Haha.  But it took a bit to master.  As I would push the left lever forward, it would go left, like if I was making a left hand turn, I would keep the right had lever in neutral.  Or sometimes I would pull back a bit on the right had lever while going forward with the left so to not tear up the ground.  When doing a straight pass both hands were on both levers trying to keep it steady.  Sometimes I'd use the brake if I felt I was going to fast to make the turn before speeding up again.  But it's quite a bit different from a steering wheel until you get the knack of it.
So Cheryl had her lesson on the way to the field and then her Dad got out to operate another piece of equipment.  Cheryl gave it a go and pushed a little on the left and saw the combine going too far that way and then pushed back on the right and then corrected again with the left, too far and a little to the right again.  Her dad signaled her to stop.  (And this is the point in my head when I thought he was going to tell her to get out and he would take over)  But she said her dad came up into the combine and put his arm around her and said, "Cheryl, you're getting this. You can do this."  And then he told her to look behind her and see where she's been.


And she said, "You know those beautiful straight rows you see of wheat.  Well, that wasn't my row.  It was back and forth and zig zagged."  "That's where you've been," her dad said.  And then her dad told her to look forward and find a point ahead of her to go.  "Focus on where you want to be." he said.




Cheryl related this to focusing on the celestial spot that we want to be and pointing ourselves and our families to the temple.
But I think this can relate to our family as well.  And that we can look behind us and see that sometimes we haven't communicated the best and sometimes we have zigged and zagged and we don't always make a straight line.  But if we only look back and see that we've only been bad at this and we have made a lot of mistakes, then that's where our focus will be.  But if we focus on where we want to go think of specific ideas on what we can do to improve our communication and our family relationships, then that's where we can be.
I feel like we've noticed this for a while.  I tried to make it a conversation at the reunion around Joshua's wedding of how we also need to share our hard times with each other as well as the good.  And I've noticed it with Grandma Erickson, when I was writing her story, she had a difficult time sharing those things that were hard in her life.  Noticing a need for change is the first step.  And then thinking of ways to change is the next.  Maybe you have ten minutes when you drive somewhere or walk to class to call a family member.  I have 30 minute recess from 10-1030, that I use sometimes to call family members.  Or maybe just a 'thinking of you' text and 'I hope your day is well' or 'can we talk tomorrow?'  And what works for some may not work for others.  Some say they feel more connected with WhatApp and they aren't likely to write a post.  Others like a phone conversations, while some would prefer a text.  Each act we do, may seem small but it makes a difference. Then with greater focus and intent, I'm pretty sure our rows will improve and be straighter. And we'll be where we want to be.