The Call

Bzzz. Bzzz. Bzzz. A number from Idaho. Weiser, I think. Interesting.

"Hello?"

"Good evening, sir. Would you be willing to answer some questions for a survey?"

"I don't know."

"It is a quick survey and it won't take much time," the caller said in an unusual accent.

Sensing desperation in the caller. "Well, maybe. How long will it take?"

"Only five minutes and if you answer three questions right then you will qualify for a trip to Australia."

Oh, no. Not one of these again. There is never a good way to say no. Be firm. Be firm.

"What is the first question?"

"Who was the first president of the United States?" Was that accent real?

"Uh.." What the? What kind of question is that? That is not a survey question. "George Washington."

"Great job. You answered one right. Only two more to go and you will win that free trip to Australia! Are you ready for the next question?"

"I guess so."

"Who was the 31st president of the United States?" That accent is definitely forced.

"Uh...um...uh..." How am I supposed to know that? I wonder if this is my seventh grade social studies teacher. I knew she'd come back to haunt me. But what about the free trip? "I don't know."

"Would you like another question, sir?" Giggling from someone other that the caller. "Let me ask you another question. You only need two more to win a trip to Australia. It is a great place."

"Are you Australian?"

"Yes, I am. Can't you tell by my accent?"

"That is not an Australian accent. It may be from a lot of other places but not Australia."

"Excuse me, sir, but I am from Australia and I have a free trip for you. Just two more questions." She replied as her accent began to falter. More giggling from other girls.

I've got her.  "I think you are from somewhere in Idaho. Maybe Boise area?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Let's see you could be a Payette Pirate, a Fruitland Grizzly or a Weiser Wolverine. Who do you cheer for?"

"Weiser!" Multiple girls shouted from the background.

Perhaps a free vacation to Weiser, Idaho would have been more appropriate.

"How old are you? I am going to guess 15." Giggles. Lots of them. I must have guessed right.

"How old are you? Are you 17?"

"Nope. So, how often do you guys do this?" I asked changing the subject. "Are you guys pretty successful?" I decided to google the identity of the 31st president. I had to see if they knew the answer to their own question.

"We get people to fall for it all the time."

"They'll even give us their information like birthdays and social security numbers," another girl answered.

Apparently I've been on speaker phone the whole time. "Well you need to practice your Australian accent. It could use some work." Giggles. "Also who was the 31st president?"

"Um..uh..." It was her turn to not know the answer.

"It was Herbert Hoover." I really could have answered anything, and they would have said that I was right. I was so close to getting a trip to Australia.

"What's your name?" I heard someone farther from the phone say.

"And how old are you?" Some one else chimed in. They really do want to know a lot about me. I was a little reluctant to give them any info.

"My name is Pedro."

"No, it isn't."

"You're right. It is not. I prefer to go by Pablo. And as far as my age goes, I am older than twenty but less than thirty."

"Are you 21?"

"No."

"22?"

"No."

"23?"

"No, and neither am I twenty-four. I will tell you that I do not live in Idaho. I am married and we have a little boy. I know some people from Weiser." I said changing the subject again. "Do you know the Bergquists or the Palmers?" Mumbled no's. "How about the Walkers?" Anyone from Weiser should know at least one Walker.

"I know a girl from school whose last name is Walker." One of the girls in the background said.

"Wait, are you Mormon?" Where did that come from?

"Yes, I am." Whispers. Ohs. Scattered apologies for some of the swear words that were said. I think they realized that they might not have been on their best behavior. "Well, I hope you girls have a good night and good luck with your prank calls and that Australian accent. I hope the people you call know who the 31st president is." After a little more deliberation, I was able to end the call. I think they were having too much fun talking. They didn't want the call to end. 

I am a little disappointed that I didn't win a free trip to Australia (even though a real survey would have asked for some kind of fee). I would have even taken a free trip to Idaho. Win a trip to Weiser: we have onions...lots of them. Sometimes prank calls work, sometimes they don't. At least I learned who the 31st president was.